Highs and Lows #2: Diamond in the Rough

Working in the Jewish world sometimes feels like riding a roller coaster- prospects, results and experiences hit highs and lows and everything in between. One gloomy minute you sense Judaism's impending demise and another you revel in the little things which give us hope.
These last two weekends, as my social life falls to non-existent status, I took a bumpy and jarring, but ultimately telling ride in the figurative amusement park of Jewish youth work. Here's how...

Part II

(Part I is posted below and gives this whole thing context)

There is another way....

After a horrifying BBYO weekend (see Part I), I welcomed an invitation I would otherwise dread to songlead at a 22 person youth group retreat with Temple Sharey-Tefilo, S. Orange, New Jersey.

It's not like I don't know what to expect. I've staffed so many of the things over the last 18 or so months, that I'm no longer shocked by Jewish teens not knowing the difference between an alef and a beis. I assume the vast majority of "Reform" teens don't know how to or want to pray. I'm aware that many see programming, especially Jewish programming as a nuisance- Enough said! Reform youth programs typically don't leave me satisfied or feeling confident in the future....

And then there are those times which remind me of my past, only a few short years ago, when I couldn't get enough Judaism, immersing myself in the movement's many avenues for youth development. These are the times that remind me why I spend the hours and weekends, on trains and in buses for the sake of a Reform-Progressive future.

At a middle of no-where camp in Pennsylvania, 22 teens came together for a weekend of singing, praying, learning and growing. The youth director mentioned that outside of youth group, most of the kids rarely, if ever socialize with eachother- but youth group remains a place for everyone. She explained that the juniors and seniors missed a major football/dance event at school and came to the STISY retreat instead. Over the course of the weekend, the Judaism-crazy Kutz alum helped to run the services. The Tiffany's wearing senior demanded Dan Nichols music and then danced along to Btzelem Elohim. The "gangsta", sports jersey, Giants hat wearing sophomore played soldier in a program about Tzahal. The trumpet blowing, tennis playing, goofy junior guy wrote a three paragraph long letter to an ailing Israeli soldier. The Freshmen girls spent 45 minutes crafting just the right prayer to be placed in the Kotel. A couple cool, cute, popular junior girls spent Shabbat afternoon learning Lo Yisa Goi on the guitar and played along during Havdalah. The openly gay, semi-flamboyant senior discussed wanting a Jewish community at college next year. The nerdy, smarty-pants freshman boy spoke eloquently on Israel's right to exist during a debate program. The entire group sang through each service, chanted through each birkat and grappled through each program from beginning to end.

The youth groupers were all a little different. They had their own opinions, interests and quirks and came together to make "them"- to bond and to form a community. This is what "we're about" one of them told me.

Each one made some part of the weekend happen. And they all, for at least this one weekend, placed their Judaism, their Jewish commitment, above everything else in their lives. They made me wish I could be one of them again. They reminded me why I do what I do.

True. It's not quite as good as it sounds. They didn't really know much. They turned to me with the most basic questions about Jewish history and the conflict in Israel. Since their Bnai Mitzvot, their prayers had gotten a little rusty. Yes, I wish someone would have nurtured their appreciation for Judaism, taught them more earlier and provided a stronger foundation. But I admired whoever it was; maybe their parents, the Rabbi, or the youth director, who taught them to care.

True. Their caring makes them unfortunately unique. Too few Jewish teens are willing to contemplate their Jewish identity, asking questions and seeking out the knowledge to form answers. And even those who do think rarely know what questions to ask or from whom to get the answers, guidance and inspiration they crave.

That's where we come in.